macos messages does not use proxy65

Hi,
Apple's messages client does not try to use the proxy65 service provided by my ejabber server so file transfer to off-site users fail.

it only does this:
streamhost jid='user@domain.com/office' host='192.168.0.150' port='49191'/

instead of this: (generated by pidgin)

streamhost jid='user@domain.com/office' host='192.168.0.150' port='47036'/
streamhost jid='proxy65.domain.com' host='proxy65.domain.com' port='7777'/

during login the ejabber server announces the service and pidgin gets the proxy but messages does not:

iq from='proxy65.domain.com' to='user@domain.com/office' id='purplefc1b045b' type='result'
query xmlns='http://jabber.org/protocol/bytestreams'
streamhost jid='proxy65.domain.com' host='proxy65.domain.com' port='7777'/
/query
/iq

When I use apple's jabber server (messages server) the macos messages client does use it's proxy65 service.

does anyone have a clue where the problem may be?

here's my proxy65 config:

{mod_proxy65,[
{host, "proxy65.domain.com"},
{ip, {0,0,0,0}},
{hostname, "proxy65.domain.com"}, (comment: this resolves ok)
{name, "SOCKS5 Bytestream Service"},
{port, 7777},
{access, all},
{shaper, c2s_shaper}
]},

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